Finkin' a Fookin'

Copyright 2006, Peter S. Baring

Colin couldn't keep from an ungentlemanly laugh at the sight of the lady in distress. A sexy, well dressed girl had suddenly stopped short outside the building society and was scraping and sliding the sole of her high-heeled boot across the pavement as she wobbled and waved on one leg. "Oohh. It's shit. It's fooking DOG shit!" she exclaimed in a hoarse voice filled with revulsion, blushing and looking furiously over at him.

She was tall and well-made, dressed in black stretchies and a short shiny bicycling jacket the same blue black color as her cut short black hair. A punk princess, actually. Could have been quite attractive really, if she didn't have a great glob of dog waste stuck on the bottom of her foot. "Fink it's funny, do you?" Her arms were waving wide to keep her balance, a filter fag plugged between sticky pink lips, huffing smoke with the effort of her attempt to clean it off. "Well, then, HELP ME, will you?"

The odour of busted turds almost overcame him, but Colin managed to keep his composure. "Here you go. Lean on this and kick your shoe back and I'll see what I can do." Colin fished a bit of cardstock from the rubbish bin and bent her leg into cobbler's position behind.

The stubbled skin of her ankle shocked his hand as he kneeled and raised her besmirched boot into place. Colin turned his head and stared with lust at a sweet close-up ass that flowed into a wide pear-shape from her waist. She was looking over her shoulder, smirking down at him. "Finkin' about Fuckin'" she said enigmatically. Colin was indeed.

Her tarty face, her made-up eyes seemed completely enchanting to Colin. They glittered green with embarassed amusement as she watched him dollop the foul substance from the instep of her boot.

"Works every time," he said. "Feed the beast in the morning, take it for a little constitutional after tea. Then just stand by with my scaping tool and wait for you. Yea, I'm 'finkin'."

She snickered, openly considering Colin as the two of them stood deciding what to do. The hot cherrystone of her cigarette glowed as she raised a slim, ring covered hand and sucked her cheeks inward hungrily. When her lips came apart during the exhale, Colin could see the swirl of smoke through the gap of a missing tooth. So slutty. Colin didn't trouble to hold back his impulse to get closer. She wanted him. She fit up against his stiffening rod like an open invitation, her hips stirring slightly from side to side as she hung her elbows up over his shoulders and grinned goofily. "I live two doors down."

"I can't wait to get my clothes off finally and get out of these god-damned shitty shoes," she said, "After standing in the bloody fings all day as well. Wouldn't mind a friendly bonk if a gentleman could provide one, either." Colin assured her he could. He was the Broker of Bonk, with impressive holdings.

"Leave the fookin' dogs in the zoo where they belong," she continued. She was a princesse au natural, just the type that Colin liked. "U O me a good one for that," she said.

Only a tawdry princess could have gotten Colin to drop his normal reserve so quickly. She had a hot heart-shape laced between her thighs, criss-crossed with cords. Inside the door of her flat she brought her hands to her waist and tugged her stretch nylon tights half down to her knees before she bent to unlace her soiled boots, presenting her bona fides, turning a pair of dainty pink skimps inside out. Colin invaded the rearward space with his hand, drew slippery fingers back along the groove.

"Feel my fings," the floozy demanded. They were luby and humid, tight and wanting. Colin jammed his palm in sideways and cracked her hips to one side. She was soaking with pussy-juice, stirring up more moisture against the row of knuckles he was presenting her. The dirty aroma was buzzing like bees behind Colin's brain, hornifying him completely, devouring the last of his inhibitions.

Colin had her absolutely gilled by the time they had swayed into the sitting room from the entry, scattering umbrella stands and bric-a-brac. She went knee down onto a small settee, her peeled pants still holding her ankles close, the heels of her shit- smeared boots pointing back at him. Now he had her slippery slit spread, elbow-sawing long strokes into her widening kerf. He could feel every part of her--her little lady button battering his fingertips, a pound's worth of fleshy quimparts rolling, her bare bottom mincing against his wrist.

Not that a face-down butt bare bumming was bad. All the same, Colin was determined to get a lot further than her femme foyer. Nothing but the bed-chamber would do, and nothing but naked. "First I want you to get your clothing off, darling. Would you do that for me? What's your name, anyhow, sweetheart?"

"Saundra."

There's nothing to make an enlisted man step out of ranks than the notion of the queen of cockdom left standing flat-footed and fuckable without a shred of her former finery. Saundra shrugged off her heavy jacket and pulled her stretchy top up over her head. A set of oversize knockers tumbled free, bobbing upward as she pulled her arms from the garment and bouncing heavily between her knees as she bent to unlace her tall boots and pull them from her feet. Colin had his trousers open in a trice and his sweet insult laid along her nose. Naked except for her name, Saundra began to lick and mouth Colin's fragrant meaty muscled length. "He's nobbut a monster," she sighed appreciatively.

Colin's penile member was a throbbing tommy as Saundra's bright waxy lips went round and she squeezed her cheeky face greedily down the length of his shaft. Now she was sucking like some EC whore taking tariff. Colin laced his fingers behind her neck and let it ride, slipping in and out, long and short, softly first and then hard as steel, again and again, satisfying her cuntinental curiousity, offering her his blunt response to the UK question.

All Colin needed was a cup of tea and a paper as he waited for his sex to be shined. He liked the way that giving him her head kept the bare chested beauty so busy. Her dark lashed eyes were squeezed shut in concentration, a thick drool of saliva juicing from the corners of her mouth as she pumped up and down the length of him. "You're so sexy, Saundra. You do that so very well," he said. He was playing with her ears, twisting short curls of black hair around the delicate shape of them as he looked down enchanted at her jouncing boobs, the straddling sight of her spread wide knees as she sat beneath him. "I think it's time we tended to that cunt of yours, don't you, darling?"

"Fink so." Saundra stood and turned up to Colin for a deep wide kiss, the meaty taste of his member delighting and disgusting him as their mouths came together. "Just don't forget my tits while you do me, OK?"

Colin was already stroking the smooth sided shapes, coaxing them outward from the squeezed space between their bodies, tracing and tickling Saundra's swelling nipples. "Pinch UM!" she demanded, her voice hot against his ear. And when he took the chewy nibs between his thumbs and fingers she went absolutely wild.

Saundra's bedroom was as earthy and open as she was. Crumpled covers on a big bouncy bed, and she backed into a sexy scent mixed equal parts from lavender and erotic urgency. "Knew U'd come tonight," she lied shamelesly, raising her bare knees to show Colin why, fingering apart a hole in the center of her fleshy slit, teasing and tempting him with her big black made-up eyes.

Colin bent his prong downward and gave himself a priming pump with his clenched fist, directing the velvet arrowhead down into Saundra's thicket to flush her female fauna. By now her cunt was wide opened, the slippery entrance swelling tight, swelling spread as he nudged his thick veiny rod inward.

"Ooh, uhh, yeah!" Saundra gasped. "Do it! Put it in ALL the way." She had her head thrown backwards, her throat exposed, and Colin could feel the buzz of her pleasure build as he pressed a kiss against her voicebox, as he kicked wedges beneath the double doors of her thighs and powered his column down deep into her warm womanly regions.

"OH!!! FUCK! FUCK! FUCK!" His palms were squeezing and shoveling Saundra's chesty sensitives, and it was so lovely to feel her pelvis shake and tighten around him in response to his rude handling. Colin had begun the four-year programme, steady as seasons, regular as a day job while his hands took on their extra-curricular activities.

The more that one part of Colin tried to remain gallant the more something about Saundra just kept drawing him further into her filthy fantasies. She led him on up the dark alley where Miss Kiss-it used to take Harry Balls, kicking and banging her trashy cans, digging through her stinky slops until she had gotten him right down to the recyclables. Saundra's punky puss-ass was tipped up at Colin, wriggling with desire around his driving shaft. "Jock me, you dumb stud!" she was demanding in a muffled urgent voice. Who the hell was she calling dumb!

In a moment Colin's hot temper had Saundra spitting and hissing like an overfilled kettle on the range, her dark-lashed eyes squeezing shut with sexual longing then popping wide and sightless as he gave her the pink banana, bumped her whole fruit stand into disarray. "That's...SO...GOOD!" she gasped. "Ride me! RIDE ME FAHSTER!"

He had his rod right in her now, his balls beginning to sling and swing as he got his driving directions and motored into Saundra- land. She was beginning to come on so sweet to him now, kicking and pedaling the air. Colin was trying to get a good grip on her big boobies but the girl kept wriggling free and making him grab, squeeze, tug them again and again.

"OHHH. I LOVE it. I LOVE it!" Saundra was sighing. She was mincing her pleasure-treasure thing all along his sticky shaft, stroking his raging tool with her whole cuntly body, talking in torrents now as the hint of a climax flashed inside her. "Don't it feel good? Oh, it feels so GOOD! OH! OOH! Right! Right! Fuck my NARSTY wet slit, you fucker, fuck my dirty hairy slit.